Articles
Advice of the Day (Forum)
Books (Forum)
Druidic Ramblings (Forum)
Dumb Ideas (Forum)
H-Town (Forum)
Links (Forum)
Movies (Forum)
Music (Forum)
Opinions (Forum)
Photo Albums (Forum)
Prose/Poetry (Forum)
Questions (Forum)
Video Games (Forum)

Basic Article Search

Enter search terms below:

Member Login

Username

Password

Register Here

View Article

Evil Dead Trap

Posted by miguel on 2003-11-11 21:06:50
1 forum posts
Well Schaus and I had quite the time watching this aggressive little gem. This is basically a Japanese imitation of Italian suspense horror films, called giallo's. The most famous giallo director is a guy called Dario Argento (who has a very hot daughter called Asia Argento, a fine actress in her own right). Evil Dead Trap is a totally unnecessary, awesome tribute to his movies, and it feels like watching an Italian horror flick while sniffing some Special K (available from a quality, local neighbourhood drug dealer).

So lets use MIGUEL'S PATENTED SUMARIZERTRON 6000. (Its all spoilers eh).

A ridiculously mongoloid host of a late night "Entertainment Tonight" type show receives a tape with footage of a woman being tortured and killed. Instead of calling the poh-leece and letting them handle it, she gathers together her equally retarded crew consisting of an idiot non-savant male and three cannon fodd...plucky females and they decide to go to this hideously spooky warehouse where the crime took place to obtain a ratings grabbing scoop.

In true Scooby-Doo form they decide to split up and investigate the place. Unlike Scooby-Doo however, they do not go on Benny-Hill like comical chases and finally unmask the monster, who is actually the bitter ex-owner of the museum (THE CLUES WHERE ALL THERE FOLKS!). No...these hapless would be detectives get skewered, crushed, sliced, choked, molested and all around smoked by the EVUHL ONE.

Eventually only the mongoloid host is left, and then the movie concludes in a horribly weird and nonsensical fashion, transmogrifying from a regular slasher into something much more supernatural and infinitely stupider

So is it actually any good? Well....these things are all relative really...it's no Ringu or 28 Days Later...ill tell you that much. But it is much better than fucking tripe like I Know What You Did Last Summer or Valentine's Day or even Jeeper's Creeper's (sorry, but it sucked). It doesn't belong in the pantheon of horror movies, but if you're hankerin for some good old-school gore, you could do worse than EVUHL DEADUH TUHRAPU.

FOR THE CHILDREN:
Actually the whole entire movie is a FOR THE CHILDREN section, but here are some choice moments:

1. The one male crew member is so uber-retarded and wears such totally awesome 80's clothes that it transcends Stupid Awesomeness and storms right into Insane Juggernautical Amazingness.

2. A totally unnecessary and overlong rape scene in the middle of the movie, and the poor woman immediately gets smoked right after in a big overkill sequence.

3. The snuff movie at the beggining is perhaps the only truly effective scene in the movie, featuring a needle through the eye and some knife cutting through flesh sequences. The Japanese do not skimp on gore scenes in movies or quality engineering for their automotive vehicles.

4. The sweet sweet get, up of this one mysterious character who appears randomly throughout the movie. Notice the crunk shades he wears.....and be , like, totally impressed by the fact the hes always chugging back some sake when you see him.

5. The horribly convoluted overkill of every death scene in this movie has to be seen to be believed. The spear impalement, tripwire crossbow&guillotine and the magical noose are mongst the high(low?)lights.

BONUS FOR THE CHILDREN:
6. The entire ending sequence is just so strange and typically Japanese that it really should be seen by those of you who haven't already hit the backspace button on your browser..

  1 forum posts